International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia 2013 #IDAHO #IDAHOT

On this day in 1990, the World Health Organisation removed “homosexuality” from its list of mental illnesses.  You may wonder why some continue to use the word “homosexual” rather than “gay” or “lesbian” .  There is a reason for that, and that reason is the fact that “homosexuality” as a word was linked directly with mental illness.  No longer by any serious practitioners in the mental health field.

Yet still our opponents use the word “homosexual” as it links directly to those times, the word itself has a stigma about it that the words “gay” or “lesbian” do not, due to the word’s history.  Yet many religious leaders, and Conservatively minded continue to use that word.

I’ve spoken previously about being gay and mental, and more specifically that the 2 things are indeed completely separate.  True, I personally, and many others are both gay or lesbian and additionally have mental illnesses unfortunately.  The mental illness part however is not a part of being gay, very often that can be society at fault for our mental illnesses, or for the deterioration in our mental health, NOT our sexuality.

It is a sort of perverted sick society which projects its own defects upon us as individuals by tarnishing some of us as mentally ill, because it frightens their sense of self.  It deeply disturbs them to see something which challenges their narrow minded pea brains.  And occasionally it also challenges their own thoughts towards themselves.  That’s right, closet cases can be some of the worst types of people, and can occasionally commit violent homophobic crimes due to THEIR issues.

That is sick society to blame.  A heteronormative ideal of “normal” whereby spousal rape and abuse was/still is tolerated in some places.  A woman’s place is in the home, that sort of thing.

That isn’t what i’d call normal, but that is what society has tolerated for many many years as “normal”.

Someone who I follow on Twitter posted this the other day:

https://twitter.com/ukschizophrenic/status/335045638616150016

I’ve often thought similar, of several mental illnesses.  Our brain is trying to process everything that is going on as best it can, naturally it is going to make some odd judgements at times.  Voting Conservative, or UKIP for example as a working class person is very odd.  Continuing to give the Catholic Church (or any other hate mongering religious sect) money in their collection boxes to fund hate if you are openly gay or lesbian is also another very odd choice!

However, being gay, straight, bi , transgender or intersex is perfectly natural to me, and of course there are continual strong discussions within and external to the transgender and intersex community  relating to gender identity, and the inclusion of disorders relating to those people within diagnostic manuals.  Various people do take different views for different reasons, and not being transgender/intersex, I don’t feel I have the ability to even comment on their own personal journeys.

You can find lots of interesting stuff on Twitter at the #IDAHO / #IDAHOT hashtags if you’d like to.

And finally, come out come out wherever you are, where it is safe to do so.  Oh and in our own country it is a lot safer than others, there is no excuse for lying.  There is of course still work to do, but so much has been done by those who came before us.

We can only speak as much as we can for those who cannot speak.  For those who truly need to remain closeted in fear of their lives in Jamaica, Uganda, Russia, etc…. We are priveleged in comparison, true, sometimes a closeted gay or bisexual attacks an openly gay or lesbian person due to internalised homophobia and projection of their issues, or a heterosexual commits such an assault.   However, overall as a community we are more priveleged than some.

Being gay or lesbian is not a mental illness, but homophobia is!

Never had that on a morning before

At least, I don’t think so.  I have been out so many times to Manchester, even when it meant sitting in a corner by myself, because at least I feel safe there.

I always feel sad returning home on the train, such a difference between my local area and the gay village in Manchester.  Following several meltdowns at the train station when i’ve been on my own during the day,  and getting very upset if I have returned hom early evening sort of time after a few hours out, I thought that what I have been doing, infrequently was the way to do it, I really did.

Returning home on the train in the morning as I said, yes, I do feel sad, but I don’t think my low mood, anxiety and paranoia have launched a 3 pronged attack on me like that before all at the same time returning home at that time, in fact I think I can say for certain that definitely has NOT happened like that before.  I was fine walking to the train station, then as soon as I was in there, that was it!

I felt the anxiety hitting me hard, I thought the station staff were all talking about me, the back of my head was tingling like mad, a low mood set in once again (which seems to have been almost constantly there for months now, with short breaks of numbness over the past few weeks)

I walked outside of the station and tried to control my breathing with the breathing excercises while having a smoke.  Yes, I know that may sound strange, but having a smoke and the breathing excercises helped me at that particular moment.

As I got on the train the nervous tics were kicking in also, nice!  I head someone laugh a few seats back, and in my mind at that time I thought they were laughing at me and those nervous tics.   Thoughts were also going through my head that the person at the back of me (I presumed was a man, although I didn’t see who was sat behind me) had a gun or a knife.  Those thoughts went quickly though.  After I heard that laughter I heard the voice of the woman who lives next door in my head, I can’t remember what she was saying now, but I have been worried for a long time due to her distinctive voice my brain would eventually latch onto it.

“Oh shit!”  I thought  No, not here, not on the train.  And I know some people may have seen me mouthing the words to myself “let the thoughts flow, don’t try to block them.  Blocking them makes it worse” But for some reason, I didn’t care, They had to flow, then my mind threw in something else, something that harked back to my 1st psychotic episode overseas.

My mind decided to let me know in the midst of all this “doesn’t that woman next door sound like someone you heard the voice of?”   Shit Shit Shit!

Repeating myself again purely mouthing it to myself “let them flow, let them flow.”  Eventually they stopped, as I felt a panic attack coming on.  I thought “no way!  You are not going to beat me!”  I did the breathing excercises again on the train, they helped.

I think these things may have hit me hard like this as a couple of people really tried to have a conversation with me overnight, on one hand I was trying desperately not to seem impolite, and exchange pleasantries, on the other hand, I didn’t want to get into a conversation, but I did, twice!  I thought the conversations were going a little too well, that’s what happens when I talk to other humans.

I will mention that to my therapist when my next block of sessions starts next week.   For now i’m going to have another smoke and a decaf coffee.  Thankfully now i’m back home I am calmer, and I managed to achieve something, I didn’t have that panic attack that time.  This time I won on one count.

Today, Ed Balls got me going!

Ooooh, hunky, don’t you think!  No, Balls has not got me going in that way, and NO, that most certainly is nothing like Ed Balls.

Mr Balls, like most of his  fellow merry band of middle england, middle class, scrounging parasitic politicians has never had a proper job in his life.  Yes, like his boss, the Labour leader, Miliband, speaks of “hard working families” like he also knows what it means, truth is hardly any of them in any party have done a proper days work in their lives.

Which brings me on to the meaning of “got me going” in this particular instance.  Actually, firstly you may wish to know what Mr Balls actually looks like in comparison.  Here you go.  As you can see for yourself, absolutely nothing like a worker.  More like a director.  For those confused, directors don’t usually do very much work at all, more like delegation, they leave the real work to others.

You may also note the purple tie.  That is Labour’s colour these days, purple, not red.  And Balls certainly is a purple Labourite, like the majority of the shadow cabinet.

Now, you may wonder, “what got you going this time?” And after all the waffling and gazing at that handsome man (reminder, that’s the worker, not the shirker) i’m getting to that now.

Today has brought very sad news about the first suicide which has occurred as a direct result of the Liberal Democrat/Conservative regime’s bedroom tax for social housing tenants.  Of course, there is plenty more blood on their hands apart from this one, upsettingly.

Until very very recently Labour were silent on the Bedroom Tax (as they have been on many of the so called welfare reforms) and jumped on the bandwagon rather late in the day, Labour of course introduced their own “bedroom tax” for private rented tenants, which the Tories can now legitimately argue (thanks to purple Labourites) they’re merely bringing the social rental sector into line with private rented.  The leadership of the so called “opposition Labour” party said nothing strongly opposing any of the welfare reforms for at least 2 years publicly.  It has taken many thousands of unnecessary deaths at the hands of Atos and the DWP to get them to speak out about the lethal system which does indeed kill.

It took until September last year for “Labour” in the guise of Liam Byrne to finally call for “fast and fundamental reform of the Work Capability Assessment system, which they introduced.  As you will note in this article, Byrne failed to apologise for Labour introducing Atos and the Work Capability Assessment, on the contrary, he went further rubbing everyone’s noses in it saying:

““Labour was right to introduce the test – and we were right to say we would change in the hard, clear light of experience.”

Labour introduced the WCA in 2008, and with an additional 2 years following the installation of the LibCon regime, and ever increasing numbers of  deaths following incorrect decisions, and destitution of claimants, it took Labour 4 years in total and hundreds of reports for them to view the evidence available.  They took too long, and Labour’s statement was too little and way too late for the thousands who had died from a system Labour introduced.  And still no apology from any senior purple Labourite figure for the corporate manslaughter of thousands, which started under them.

So, given all the above, you can imagine my irritation when I caught a glimpse of the clip mentioned in this article reporting on the suicide of a bedroom tax victim.  As I twittered after that:

According to @edballsmp Is just #bedroomtax driving people to edge of despair, the rest of it fine he in favour of "tough welfare reform"—
TSA APG (@TSAAPG) May 12, 2013

Yes, he did actually use agreement with  “tough welfare reform” in the same sentence he used to admonish, erm “tough welfare reform”.  You see, that is modern day Labour, stab you in the back one minute, arrange nationwide protests saying “we’re really on you’re side” the next minute.  At least you know where you stand with the Cons, they’re sadistic bastards who don’t care about killing thousands,  whereas Labour and the Lib Dems will claim they’re unhappy about doing so, but will do it anyway.

Purple Labour, like the Lib Cons are also fans of workfare.  As are UKIP.  Oh yes, if you thought this regime were experts at corporate manslaughter try voting UKIP in and see what happens!

If you haven’t yet seen it, take a look at  UKIPs “Welfare to Workfare” policy (PDF), which describes claimants as a “parasitic underclass of scroungers”.  Seems very establishment like to me to use that sort of language, despite their attempts to appeal to anti establishment types.

And if you’re working class and unlucky enough to fall on hard times, that UKIP welfare policy in 2010 suggested rates for a benefit they propose, similar to Universal Credit which is being introduced under the Lib Cons of around £45 and about £60 odd depending on age per week.  All available at that link for you to check for yourself.

Now it seems there are options to these 4 establishment parties on this issue for working class people who are worried about falling ill, or getting sacked/made redundant, depending on where in the UK as it stands right now you live.

The Green Party of England and Wales is far more progressive than any of the above named 4 establishment parties.  The Green Party proposes a form of the Guaranteed Basic Income, which i’ve blogged about previously.

The SNP in Scotland would substantially change social security in an independent Scotland, and make it a much more civilised society than the UK as a whole under Lib Con control currently is, or under Labour, which is drifting further and further rightwards.  And not to be forgotten, the so called “Better Together” campaign is supported by all 4 of the above named establishment political parties.  And it is alleged, the “Better Together” campaign is linked to terrorists and tyrants.

There are others of course, but these are the 2 most high profile political parties who have loudly opposed the current War on Welfare instigated by Thatcher, then Blair, then Cameron, Clegg now Miliband, Balls and their ilk also.  All 3 main Westminster parties are completely tied up in the thousands of avoidable deaths.

Those of us who depend on social security to survive (not merely getting free handouts to get free porn, duck houses, moats, etc… at tax payers expense as a luxury.)  need to reassess traditional party allegiances depending on individual election candidates, because things need to either go back towards the left, or else we will drift towards an England under UKIP control.  And do you really want that?

Please see the WOW Petition by clicking here, which calls for a cumulative impact assessment of the deadly “welfare reforms”. (Currently over 38,000 signatures)

Please see also this petition from a fellow blogger, Jayne Linney calling for the Work and Pensions Committee to hold Iain Duncan Smith to account for his blatant lies. (Almost 89,000 signatures so far)

Also, please take a look at this petition to investigate the DWP and connected MPs for corporate manslaughter in relation to the WCA and Atos. (Almost 3000 signatures so far)

Additionally, there is this very worthwhile petition calling for the DWP to supply all claimants of Employment and Support Allowance and Personal Independence Payments with a short form for  GP/Consultant asking if special rules apply to safeguard vulnerable people from unnecessarily traumatic interrogations. (Just over 3000 signatures so far)

Sex and the age of consent

Sex is a wonderful, and marvellous thing.  Done in the right way, it can bring joy, depending upon individual circumstances of course.  For Heterosexuals they may also cause additional children.  Depending upon individual point of view, that could be good or bad of course.  Despite the politically correct, true gays cannot breed children.  Anal sex does not cause children!  Closet cases or bisexuals perhaps, but truly openly gay, no, unless donating to a sperm bank.  Don’t try to keep up with the Cons.  That’s the hetero agenda!

Now, I must say, before continuing, that my personal preference is for older males than myself, or the same age, roughly.  I never usually go for younger than myself.  I like someone with experience, somebody aware, somebody informed, somebody who is open about their sexuality, somebody who is not a closeted gay/bisexual.

I have stated previously, I have difficulties with closet cases, which I am still trying to work through.   This cannot be helped, it’s just one of those things.  I am openly gay and therefore attracted to masculine faces, closeted types are seemingly more attracted to feminine or youthful faces.  From experience I have found the more closeted types are more attracted to the more youthful or feminine faces, and I am not going to go into that any further.  That is their issue, and up to them to resolve, not me.  I don’t even like thinking about that sort.

Now, the age of consent, it seems a lawyer has suggested that the age of consent be reduced to just 13.  I disagree wholeheartedly!  Sick bastards like Jimmy Savile, or Stuart Hall would take full advantage to abuse their prey.  As would other “alleged” abusers, mostly conservatively minded who allegely have abused, who are so far outed.  The latest of course “alleged” abuser being Jimmy Tarbuck.

Historically, the age of consent in England was 12, raised to 13, then 16 in Victorian times for heterosexuals, due to the feral middle and upper classes abuse of children.

The “Buggery act” of 1533 was the first anti gay legislation I believe in the world under Henry VIII.  So, while heterosexuals were having their wicked way with children, aged only 12 years old, and most likely younger, same sex sex was a criminal act, whatever the age.  The Vatican still apparently has an age of consent of just 12 years old for heterosexuals, pointing fingers at us terrible “intrinsically evil” gays, while they continue raping children and molesting them, as worldwide reports show very well.

Today, a lawyer called Barbara Hewson decided to call for an age of consent of only 13 years old!  Seriously, she really did!  As I said, I disagree, very much so.

I try to think back to myself at the age of 13.  Things were difficult enough without even thinking of sex at the time.  My parents had undergone separation after separation (Thank you Catholic Church for prolonging the torture) for years.  It probably wasn’t until I was late 14 early 15 that I began to become attracted (consciously at least) to other males of the same age (Although thinking back now I seem to remember being attracted to other males earlier than that).

By the age of 15 myself and someone of the same age had been experimenting with our sexuality for quite a few months.  And judging by the amount of teenage pregnancies, this experimentation did not purely exist among us gays.

However, saying that, just because some of us did experiment and understand our sexuality does not mean that everybody of that age was so ready to accept themselves.  In fact, I only acknowledged I was gay to myself at about 17, and held back from penetrative sex until my late 20s/early 30s.  That is quite some time!  I came out to my parents when I was about 19.  My mum was upset but accepting, my dad said I was brave at the time to call and ask to meet to tell him.

13 years old is far too young for sexual experiences.  I do think there is an argument for those, like myself who experimented at 14/15, who should not be criminalised.  however I do NOT believe that anyone above 16 such as Jimmy Savile and his ilk should somehow be given some sort of route to underaged children.  The ideal situation would seem to be that those who are above 16 should stick to those who are older than 16 (The age of consent here of course being 16 for all), and for those who are 13, 14, and 15 not being criminalised for expressing their sexuality, unless that is forced and unwanted.

Those who experiment with others of the same sort of age within 2 years, between 13 and 15 years old should not be criminalised so long as the acts are consensual.

The age of consent should remain overall at 16.  With a separate age of consent of between 13 and 15 with maximum of 2 years difference, so that no one above 16 can take advantage of children.

I remember sex education at school vividly, it was confusing to me.  We were shown slide shows of cocks, balls, the vagina, sperm, etc…. we had a lesson with a dildo, I looked at it in amazement!  How on earth did people manage that? (We never had a banana, I think, unusually, we had a dildo) Then there was a slide show about having a bath after sex.

The questions swirled around that were never answered.  In Thatcher’s Britain questions couldn’t be answered.  Section 28 stopped that.  People were for breeding in evangelical Thatcherite England, not for gayness.

Thoughts while dog sitting

What a lovely day it is today.  It is apparently heading towards the 20 degree mark this afternoon.  I’m not sure what that is in farenheit, possibly the low 70s?  In any case, it’s quite pleasant.

My sister, brother in law and niece and nephew have gone out for a few hours, and so I am dog sitting.  I find dog sitting to be much more enjoyable than babysitting, and somewhat less stressful.  I find being responsible for them for longer than say an hour very draining and am always worried when I look after them that if one should have an accident it would be my fault somehow.  That’s not to say I don’t like them, of course that isn’t the case, they are my niece and nephew after all.

It’s been a while since I last posted and have had numerous things running through my mind, so as I have use of the laptop here, sat on this comfy couch with a cuppa, I felt a blog post coming on.

Last Thursday local elections took place, mainly for English county councils.  The governing Conservatives and Liberal Democrats both lost seats, while the opposition Labour party, UKIP, and the Green Party gained seats, overall, it was a win for centrist and rightist parties, with the only truly left wing party these days (the Greens) making a smaller number of gains than the more centrist Labour, and far right wing UKIP.  The other far right party, the BNP lost their seats, I presume many of their voters turned to UKIP, the supposedly more reasonable face of the far right.

It was rather disheartening to see UKIP gaining around 25% of the vote as a whole.  Although the turnout was pathetic.  But still, people actively decided to vote for that sort.

Then there was news the other day that the deputy speaker of the house of commons, Nigel Evans MP had been arrested for alleged rape and sexual abuse.  Certain media described the alleged acts as “gay rape”.  Now, first of all Daily Heil Mail sorts the allegations began from a time when Mr Evans was a closet case, and not openly gay, and secondly, I don’t see the media using “straight rape” for the many many heterosexual crimes of that nature committed.  Not to mention the same sex rapes committed by supposed “heterosexuals” (Don’t worry, i’m getting to closet cases in a short while)  Still, we will have to see the outcome from all of that.

As far as closet cases go, I have always made my views clear.  I distrust closet cases, in particular closet case bisexuals.  It was a closet case bisexual who attempted to sexually assault myself, I think I was 17 or 18 at the time. There have been various scientific studies conducted looking at internalised homophobia in closet cases, and in the more extreme cases, violent homophobia.  I do not apologise whatsoever for pointing out these facts, they are facts, and pointing those out is not so called “biphobia”.  Call it what you like, I have specifically spoken of closeted bisexuals .  Open and honest bisexuals are fine and much less likely to commit violent homophobic crimes, or sexual assaults or rapes.

Several people on Twitter attempted to lecture me on both my views on UKIP and closet cases.  I don’t think I have blocked so many people in such a short space of time on Twitter before.